What drug did you take that made the cabinets scream at you?
it's just like freshman year of high school, with more drugs
I had a new years resolution not to be a whore anymore, but I think I'm gonna wait till 2011
The theme is smores and alcohol. Dress appropriately.
Do you think he woke up this morning, looked at you, and then regretted everything?
Sudden realization: I dumped him because he was too immature, yet I am the one who moved back into my parent's basement post-breakup.
sitting in the bathroom telling some girl to keep puking or she will die. while holding a beer. nursing school rocks.
He had seven beers and tap-danced on the table like a pro. HOW DOES HE DO IT
The first couple times was just weird, but after last night, I'm beginning to think you have a real problem banging pregnant women who are carrying someone elses child.
Would be in best interest to sanitize the DVDs
You don't know commitment until you try and waterproof a non-waterproof vibrator
I was the girl at the bar last night passing out free condoms and making sure everyone knew how to use them to keep the population down
Apparently fireball doesn't mix well with my no carb diet
Why the fuck was I face down on the floor with you mounting me like a horse anyway? I'm so confused
I might be a bit late, couldn't find my pants and had to go to the police station. Unrelated
Randomize
