she just sneezed while going down on me. is it rude for me to ask her to do it again?
My boss just told me $1,000 at a six hour event wouldn't be worth her time. She makes $70k a yr. and apparently never learned multiplication.
everytime he calls himself the maxipad master i can't help but wonder what costume that would involve.
and you tried to get a free burrito from Potbelly's
im so poor im using the bottom of my laptop to heat my food.
ENDLESS SCROLLING ON TUMBLR WAS MADE FOR HIGH PEOPLE!
I sang Jenna happy bday in the middle of throw up hurls
he can show you his cooooock\nshining, shimmering, splendiddddd
I just had a threesome in the back of my mom's van. I'm pretty sure the rest of my week is going to be epic.
I came back to consciousness and found myself sitting in a beanbag chair petting a 2 month old husky with one hand and eating an oreo Klondike bar with the other. This almost makes me forgive blackout lisa for making out with that chubbs at the xmas party
Simple math equation: Up till 5 a.m. drinking + up at 9 a.m. for nephews birthday party = puking in the pool
3 cups of coffee and some molly. The "Tay's Day Off Diet"
I remember the Prince Albert and the three penises in the threesome. But the rest no.
Sorry for trying to wake you up by slapping your ass with a fruit 2 go.
Whenever a guy asks me why I like weird sex stuff, I just answer, "Catholic School".
Randomize
