I would do horrible things to your vagina.
Prove it.
I had a dream that I had 21 friend requests. it was the best day
i was more sad about losing him as neighbor on fishville than as a boyfriend
Things you are not allowed to do while im gone: sell cats on ebay, put cats in freezer again, shave cats like lions, dye cats pink/blue, try to light cats on fire to"wake them up from their nap" agian
He just "revenge puked" on her kid. I think we'll be leaving soon.
Apparently she doesn't appreciate the significance of eskimo sisterhood as much as I do.
You went around chanting "dinosaur period" and drinking tomato soup from the can.
Can you please reassure him im not a scary or intimidating person? And that really my entire life is a series of completely ridiculous events that have led me here?
This isn't a because its valentines day booty call, it's a because your cock is phenomenal booty call that happens to be on valentines day..
All i hear is "BITCH BETTER HAVE MY HONEY" and i turn around and there is a dude in a bear costume. It was fur real.
I just got three pairs of underwear free and a bathing suit for $20 by modeling them and letting the salesman grope me a bit.
It's great being a young gay man in Chicago!
True. So did you hook up with pasta or the ultimate warrior
Little bit of both
Alas my dad DD'd me. Legit cock blocked to the highest degree
pls come over. need ride to hospital once taquitos are ready
I knew I was in for a long night after I filled the empty pinata carcass with beer, bit off the top of one of it's legs and used it as a beer bong.
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