Planet Earth isn't gonna get stoned and watch itself.
she had no gag reflex. and is an abercrombie model. i love college.
Don't tell me wow. Tell me this is normal for college and in no way am I a whore.
Say something like you want him to fuck you behind a McDonald's. Guys secretly love weird shit like that.
I actually enjoy jerking off to her facebook more than I enjoy actually fucking her. Just something with our generation
Hey. Hey you. Just wanted to let you know that I'm adorable. FUCKING ADORABLE. That is all. This update brought to you by our proud sponsor bud light.
His dick is longer than my foot and I'm a size 9. I'm literally kicking myself in the vagina
She had caution tape on her head and she blew me.
She said I'm so hungry I could eat a dick and winked at me
Best thing she said after I kicked her out "rugby guys have single handedly ruined my faith in men"
I know I say this every year but 2015 will be the year I finally have sex with David's sister
If Plan B had a rewards card I would have earned so many free tote bags by now
You said, "I'll have this whole island inside of you by 6 AM. Just point out who you want and I'll make it happen."
If we had a dog do you think we would be less hoe-y?
Nah
my roommates are pretty pissed at me. they sent me out for ice and i came back with a kitten.
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