In retrospect, it was a terrible idea, going down on her with these ulcers in my mouth.
its officail im naming my first born child brickbreaker
there's chicken and sequins in our bathroom sink. part of me almost wants to know what happened
Just found my mom passed out in my bed holding a bag of wine. Not sure if I'm ashamed or proud.
I just washed champagne and tuna off my body. I feel like that was a successful shower.
I honestly don't know what my boundaries are, but shitting on me is crossing them.
WHY AM I BEING COCKBLOCKED BY A KID PLAYING HAVA NAGILA ON THE SAXAPHONE
The liquor store was handing out free shots of some new expensive vodka, but they caught on the fourth time we came back in different outfits. Politics.
There's always one sober annoying person at a party. I hate responsible people. I just wanted to show everyone my nipples. There cute. She didn't have to stop me
Really because I got kicked out the eagles game for running up n down the steps singing ' fly eagles fly ' then punched a Dallas fan in the face before the game even started..
you know it's a good party when the fucking floor caves in. THE FUCKING FLOOR.
Watermelon juice. Makes everything better. Gin. Wine. EVERYTHING.
Am I really that high, or did I just spray febreeze outside ?
I swear I have some evil slut demon in me when I'm blacked out
Don't we all.
i just used your hair clip to unclog my bong. i miss you so much!
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