I have said "that's the wrong hole" for the last time.
wtf someone played my fucking brickbreaker games and lost i had ten fucking lives. ughhh
maybe you did when you were drunk
no way, i wasn't THAT drunk.
That should be a holiday. like easter. but bulges instead of baskets
every time fb tells me a dude i fucked is now friends with another dude ive fucked, i die a little inside. thats way more honesty than im comfortable with.
There is no way I'm taking advice from somone who's idea of a balanced diet consists of vodka and lemon detox juice
He played the same pre-sex songs as his brother...
You insisted on going outside so you could "breathe real air".
Only you two could pull off a partner swap with honeymooners
I just want a teacup pet pig so I can take him to parties with me and never have to walk home alone again.
it's just not right when you're boyfriend has a nicer ass than you do.
Idk she didn't seem that weird to me but I had just eaten an entire tray of jello infused with liquor so I could be wrong...
Have 7 min to kill while I wait for liquor store to open. Feels really awkward.
Coming straight to your house after the flight. If not in Federal Prison for disobeying peanut laws.
I made out with him in the club and he endorsed me on Linkedin. My networking skills are off the charts.
Is it appropriate to be taking shots at 11 on sunday?
Absolutely same thing as church only different
Randomize
