when your hometown is famous for abortion clinic bombings, hurricanes, and jude law's newest bastard, its probably time to move.
I even made an effort to dress like a conservative young lady who doesnt black out and throw up in her bed regularly today.
in the middle of it he kept shouting: im going to be masturbating to this for the rest of my life
after watching ten minutes of "the decision," I conclude that King Lebron has more influence on America than Barak Obama. I love our countries values.
do not give him the "i just had sex cake" i repeat DO NOT give him the cake. things didn't go well
I do remember getting hit in the face by an ugly one because she thought I was blowing on her butthole.
Well, find something you can use as a snorkel and be aware of your surroundings.
I finally looked at the pictures from last night thanks for feeding me and pulling my pants up
I keep telling myself that if Britney can make it through 2007, I can make it through this date.
Also, even though this really sucks now, we will look back on this one day and laugh at the time we all got arrested on Thanksgiving
The fact that he said "there's nothing wrong with being a raging drunk, just ask my mother." has me thinking that I have no positive role-models among my friends.
You wanna know how bad I feel? I couldn't get out of bed to get the remote, so I just downloaded the comcast app on my phone so I could change the channels
I feel like I'm eight miles away and my brain is just now getting here. You got a lot of fucking catching up to do.
he just fluffed my hair and told me I had to dance with him because we were both gingers.
Fly, little bird! Repopulate the ginger race!
Did you ever hear the story about the time I did blow in a bar bathroom with the #1 ranked golfer in the world?
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