I sk at the spereo and my dad gave me and all access pass
what???
AN ALL ACCESS PASSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSS
fine then we can just have courtesy sex i definetly won't like it
After work we went home to fool around. Turns out he had sawdust under his foreskin. I'm never going down on him again.
i guess you could say your face is two degrees of separation from my balls
you are the best fuck buddy i could have, all the others get feelings and morals involved
She said "I only hook up with guys I'm dating"
So... What happend then?
We dated for an hour, i broke up with her after. BOOM.
I'd invite him but there's too many people who have fucked me going already
Thank you, bloody toiletpaper I found in the hamper. I was worried that today was going to be boring.
We left the bar, went to a sex shop, bought penis shotglasses, went back to the bar and insisted that the bartender used them.
It's so hard to find a shirt to wear out that is easily taken off, cut off my paramedics, but says "I'm a grown, respected woman"
So help my penis see only you. Give him some attention as well.
Come to find out, there is a place where binge drinking and aggressive head butting is completely appropriate. In a mosh pit, Travis is just a regular dude!
Wore a burger king crown while giving head still drunk this morning #blessed
Also, there's definitely not a non-hilarious way to ask to stick something up your butt.
how early is too early to start drinking over the gilmore girls revival
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