Gfs sis is in town. Its awkwardly obv that we want to fuck each other.
People were stuck in the elevator screaming and freaking out. I banged on the door and yelled, "fire depart!" They got excited and then I ran away. lolz
That's the last time we joust in Radio Flyer wagons after margarita night.
This hot topless Jamaican just ran down the st with me on his back and He was screaming "I be stealing yo white ladies."
I don't know if i should be jealous or worried... or question where you are.
I'm doing somethin that's never been done before...the 10 am booty call come over
Fuck I keep finding new battle scars from our fight. Justin told me I stabbed you with a broom handle.. Do you remember ripping my pants off?
Almost screamed "GO FISH MOTHER FUCKER" at the girl I nanny today. Drunken card games shouldn't bleed into my sober life.
it's almost 8pm and i'm still hungover. at what point do i alert someone?
I can't even masturbate anymore!! That was my last source of cardio!!
You called a girl at 4:30am to tell her "your pussy is my top priority" while simultaneously Urban Spooning late night cafes.
Next time you see his dad you should let him know you are now Eskimo brothers.
Though I do have to question why i found you and my brother passed out on his bedroom floor, no clothing between you except his tie wrapped around your dick
I bought a machete, tennis balls, and matches. How is this NOT going to be a great night?
I'll explain later but I just had to legally commit to abstinence for the next 4 months
Just because I'm asexual doesn't mean I can't have a revenge fuck.
Randomize
