Dude, I found out the hard way that she wipes back to front. I ate her out and had to throw up.
Her vagina was like a man-sized safe.
only if we run a train.
done.
Definitely saw about 20 people at my final that were never present before. It's like seeing who's gonna be serving me fries in 4 years.
One of my students just said I have "big mommy parts". Even third graders know that my tits are too big. God I love em.
My own vomit just splashed me in the face. How's your day going
I feel like letting the same guy who shot him dig the pellet out of his leg with a pocket knife was the bigger mistake
Party was cancelled. Me and my dog are high as tits. Wanna go roam the outlet mall?
My mom now keeps ice cubes on hand for my bong water. We may be able to work this relationship out.
Gym?
Sweet baby Jebus, no. I'm Motley Crue hungover. This must be how it feels to rail a line of ants.
You made a course evaluation for your vagina? Wow. You really are a professor now.
I'm pretty sure you and I ate the entire Keebler elf weed workshop
You asked me if I was judging you for being drunk, and if I can hypnotize you make sober.
A dude was barking out of one of the buildings so I barked back and he goes, "Oh shit! She barked back! Come to room 803 I'll fuck you!"
I hooked up with a guy named Quan.. I literally hit the Quan
Randomize
