and before you know it i was laying next to him at 2 in the morning with penis and sadness on my breath.
is 69 when you're sideways or up & down? I was on my back & confused.
Absence makes the cock grow harder.
we've been doin it since '07. it's like married sex now, were both comfortable so neither of us really tries anymore, we just do it because it's convenient
He may or may not be blacked out. We put him to sleep in the community bathroom. He's wrapped in your blanket and he's already puked on it twice. Using your blanket was my idea. Maybe next time you'll ask before taking my vodka.
Want to get naked in Baltimore this weekend?
I can't remember where my feet are. All I can see are colors, and all I can feel is terror. The lollipop was a bad idea.
Yup. We're now banned from TWO of our nation's finest zoos.
I got about 15 snapchats from you with your hand saying "you want cheese sticks" or something like that and one of some weird looking weed
So many gingers... It's like a beacon went out that said "this one is ok with red hair"
10/10 dentists agree that he is one bangable mother fucker. hint: i am all of these dentists.
You've got until 8 and then I'm kicking down your door and pouring a beer down your ass via funnel
I've peed outside too many times in just this past week
That's like a fucking falcon or some shit. I don't know birds but I know that is not a bird you fuck with.
Dude, what the hell where you thinking last night
Welllllll basically they were like "challenge" and I was like "accepted"
Randomize
