she was hot for a redneck and i dont look at teeth
You remember correctly you did get a golf cart ride out but it wasnt because you were special. You were so smashed you were screaming tiger at random golfers in the middle of there backswing.
Best text conversation ever. Other than the one we had about using blood for lube.
...I woke up with a yo yo in my underwear...
is it bad that listening to the rabbi's wife talk about how we should only be with one person is making me really, really horny for no string attached sex
I kinda wish he had even a slight idea of the sex I'm planning for his departure. I'm literally studying for it.
Is putting "Tonight I'm Fucking You" on my date playlist too forward?
she has like 12 pairs of underwear people left at her house from the other night
if i actually get asked out by my dealer what could happen?
i don't know, but it probably involves bathtubs full of weed
Neat. I'm thinking about growing a handlebar muffstache. What are your thoughts on this?
& I just realized there is no vomit smiley. There needs to be a vomit smiley
My apartment is also really close to an alcohol rehab in case I get out of hand
My life has evolved from screwing randos, ok?
I'm so bored I talked to the Bible guys for 30 minutes.
I offered them beer last time they came here bahaha
Are you coming over for scrambled eggs and hand jobs?
Randomize
