I puked in the cab and in my hair and he didnt even know
he just kept saying that he had liquor dick..then he tried to fuck me without removing his pants.
her boobs were like sundried tomatoes..
I hate the Packers so much, I wouldn't cheer for them if they were playing al Qaeda.
The only thing I really remember is repeating "I hope I still have a job on Monday". Oh and pulling my boob out of my dress.
So I take it the company Christmas dinner went well then...
I could be wrong, but im pretty sure i jumped off the roof after my lighter.
We left the bar in 2 bicycle cabs. It cost thirty bucks and they took us to the wrong hotel. When we finally made it to the right one we ended up in a room with three randos from alaska. Jammed out with them for like an hour. Those inuits are good guitar players
the cab driver said that we weren't the worst shit show he'd ever seen, CHALLENGE ACCEPTED!!
You know I found it really difficult to find a full lenght picture for the egg donor site where I wasn't holding any alcohol...
apparently putting your t-shirt on your head with a bottle of captain and telling girls your the pirate king of tallahassee doesn't work
So you're on like a list there now..."Do not under any circumstances give this person a knife. Serve them in plastic cups ONLY"
Btw I have come to the conclusion that we really need to do it in a bed. Like at least once..
Last night I had a sex dream about Trudeau, he hasn't even been prime minister for 24 hours
Just once I'd like to go out and not have to tell you to put your pants back on.
I went to smoke a bowl and realized that my lighter is out and there's still frozen blueberries in my bong... I need to reevaluate my life...
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