Def slept AT the bar last night, wow that's a first!
Sitting in the library lobby in the middle of exam week. Drunk. Dressed as santas slutty helper. Waiting for the student shuttle service. People are clapping for me as they walk by. Tell me how this isnt college
I wish my dick could take responsibilities for his own actions
it was frightening. in my opinion the only thing that should resemble a vagina is a vagina.
Who would have guessed that on my moms birthday she'd have sex with the door open. :(
hooking up with my manager sounds like an even better idea while i'm sober.
Do any of you want to be on a three way call with me while this girl masturbates in 10 min? You can't talk
we've decided whoever is stupid enough to use the condom that's tacked to the wall deserves to get pregnant.
I would pay to watch a Bravo special of you getting Botox.
You seemed underwhelmed by my smooth, smooth ass
Nothing like walk of shaming to the bus stop in your bar clothes at noon and seeing the fire truck you work on drive past with the other shift giving you thumbs up.. Brotherhood at its finest
Success! We fucked roommates!
A stripper set a mans ass on fire... the club smelled like burning ass and boxers.
All I could think about was how many vaginas had been on the toliet that I was pukin in
Is there any reason why a taxidermic donkey head is in the shower?
Randomize
