it was all good till he told me to dance slow and quiet
Did yall have sex?
Well we both woke up naked and there was a condom wrapper on the floor, but I don't remember so does that count?
Def not... that's how I managed to keep my number under 10 for all of college- If you don't remember, it didn't happen
this is a mass text to all the people i smoke weed with. I have Mono, so if we've shared a bong/pipe. sorry man.
he's washing the lighter in the sink and telling me to picture unicorns. requesting backup.
I think you have the right to know, the water bottle you drank out of the other night is the bottle we use to catch what drips from the toilet. Love you!
Not sure I just ate a really big pot brownie, I feel like my future is uncertain
I'm hoping they send me home from work drunk.
Glad to know I rate above a cabbage on the parenting scale.
I just want to be able to run around naked and eat grass with no judgments and have people feed me and expect me to sleep all the time.
I woke up snuggling a bottle of water while Hercules played on Netflix. Whiskey Wednesdays
I woke up with chocolate melted between my tits. I'd say that's a win for all parties involved.
Move ovrr Titanoc and all you others. Heres the real tale of woe. This ladys failed search for boozdy goodnezs.
WHY HAVE SO MANY THING GONE IN MY BUTT ON THIS TRIP
I just saw elmo dancing with gumby. The bars at 7a.m. are AWESOME.
I just wiped my butthole and there was glitter down there.
Randomize
