Help i just walked in on mom blowing dad
cant go down on her man, her vagoo reminds me of a face hugger from aliens
he then started listing things that have been up his butt, never drinking in boys town again
please stop judging me for buying a handle of soco on a thursday at 10am. it was on sale, i'm thinking of my future.
In fact, not a good idea to go into any house alone after a man invites you in from his balcony.
I just canoed to the bar. I am a skilled drunk paddler.
He told me my butthole was like "Narnia" and that it's a wonderful place he would like to visit.
I just stood still on a stair at the train station expecting it to go down automatically like an escalator... Today's going to be a good day
I thought we were but then I freaked myself out. So I kind of geared him up for take off and then cancelled the launch
He didn't call me beautiful but he came in less than five minutes so same thing, right?
People will say "JOE YOU MUST TURN DOWN" and I will refuse, in the name of liberty.
Also, there's a guy walking around the kitchen in a shark onzie, and he just asked if we've ever smoked weed with a shark before. I'm dying
we can no longer cook chicken in the house. his name is herbert, we are keeping him and can not eat his people in front of him.
I need an honest answer, no judgements. Would it make me a bad person if I fucked the other twin?
I love Texas men! TSA agent found my vibrator, nodded approvingly, and said, “You have a nice night, ma’am” with a cowboy accent. I almost made out with him on the spot
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