hahahahahahhahahahaha. 26, Dominican, has a funny accent, thinks I'm hot. Tots boning.
I'd say this is worse than that time when I realized that my favorite bath toy growing up was my Mom's douche bottle.
drunk me just left notes all around the apt to remind shitfaced me that i have mashed potatoes in the fridge. do not take them down if you come home before me.
I just remembered I opened the taxi door when I was at a red light last night and puked. And then when I was done I closed the door and told him he may proceed with caution.
I keep reminding myself that my vagina isn't a homeless shelter.
its sad that I know 23 beers will fit into my purse
No, the responsible one does not yell out "lets go to iHop" at 5 in the morning to a bunch of drunk people with munchies.
Think of it this way, instead of a puppy, we're getting a baby.
He challenged me to a drink off, I couldn't just say no. It was a matter of pride really.
And as he was cursing your name from the bathroom you were ordering yourself another drink on his tab. The poor bastard had no clue you were a pro drunk
I wouldn't call us friends exactly. Honestly I just hang out with him so I can hit on his girlfriend. They won't last long, and I'll be there to pick up the scraps
You didn't throw up on me, you threw up on yourself and then tried to give me a hug
the universe is starting to freak me out.. ive now had sex with 3 people who were born on the same day..
So far 2 of my professors caught me looking at their dicks
There are twenty eight units in that building. There has to be at least one heterosexual in it. You can't have fucked your way through all of it.
He ate me out while I stood on his bed drinking a Rainier.
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