So I got hit on by a gay guy. It might have something to do with the fact that I licked his nose.
And why did you do that?
Tequila
please explain to me why there is a shopping cart in my living room.
I remember seeing LSAT prep books and thinking "Whose room is this? I should be hooking up with them instead."
did i get hit in the head with a hammer? someone just asked me...
I ended up driving home on my birthday, he opened the door to puke on the highway, and animal balloons were flying out of the car the entire time. The people behind us got a show.
My ex was here I looked him in the eyes when I grabbed some other guy by his belt and dragged him to a room
I think the camel was justified in biting me.
Stop banging my friends. This is getting weird.
Stop being friends with hot 18 year old girls.
She almost killed me. The shot she handed me had tacks in it. Wtf?!
A prostitute stole us beer at 3 am
Sorry, I was watching the Olympic story about the Canadian guy and drinking out of the prescription bottle and crying because it was so beautiful.
Her hookup left his underwear and shorts in the dorm last night... What he was wearing when he left, we may never know.
Good luck. While you're suffocating on a dick, I'll be eating pizza rolls. Being a good girl.
Let's just say that I took off my pants and I had superman boxers on. Then she took off her pants and she had batman panties on. I think she's the one!
Well, he pretended he was climbing me like he was a monkey and I was a tree during sex.
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