One of my boys faked an orgasm while fucking a girl tonite, w/ out wearing a condom mind you.
She caught him, and immediately put her clothes on and left.
i just had sex. the condom broke. we're sleeping in to separate beds. And im in albany
she just waddled down the stairs behind me and puked and kind of reached for me but i sped up. does that make me a bad person?
i think guys who wear condoms are gentleman.
When he took off his pants i accidently shouted "that is one small wiener," and thats when he left
you'd think someone with a dick that small would take what he could get
he asked me if i would dance for him to make it easier for him to jack off. does that answer your question.
Is it penis luge time yet?
Will you please bring your dog over today? Apparently I was drunkenly cooking last night. There's food everywhere. I'm too hungover to clean.
I think it was clear she was setting us up when she brought me over to you and said "Present!"
I didn't know your ex looked like a male Khloe Kardashian?
Ah well. Drinking wouldn't be drinking without mystery bruises
Agreed.
You don't understand. My ass is the color of eggplant.
I need ecstasy. And, before you ask, the answer is yes right now
I woke up covered in thousand island dressing. I need answers.
Nothing says depression like laying in your bed stoned, naked, and eating a cupcake
Randomize
