I mean, she is a dancer for the Suns. If I didnt fuck her that would just be bad team spirit.
So the weirdest part of it all was he whispered in my ear "can i eat you out on your tredmill?" I dont find him attractive at all anymore
watchout when you come home, dougs at the top of the stairs naked eating doritos
I learned the names of so many hookups when they read them at graduation
My favorite part was walking in the bathroom, you fixing yourself in the mirror, calling your reflection a fag, then throwing a haymaker into the paper towel dispenser before going back out to the bar.
Had to have a serious talk with my liver and remind it that it is my birthday weekend and there are three more nights like last night ahead of us
Two dudes got up on top of the pianos and danced shirtless. They didnt even get kicked out. I love vegas
Just warning you now f you do not get intoxicated with me in front of the family on thanksgiving we are not related.
I feel like death gave me a hand job
Is the mullet a good, great, or horrible idea before we leave for college
So I almost just died there. And we need a new garage door.
You also proposed and then tried to jack me off
There's nothing quite like having a little 8 year old boy hand me a Bible on campus while I'm on my way to the health center because of my recent slutty tendencies.
Because you touch yourself at night.
...What time of day am I supposed to do it?
Thrres cinnamon everywgte. Plead cine get me
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