Whod you bang
its sad that the first thing i assume is that ur trying to indirectly tell me you fucked on a breakfast table
by asking you if you bought one for the apartment?
you shoved the noah's ark of animal crakers in your mouth saturday.
we'll penetrate his innocence with our dicks
Immaculate conception is definitely the most boring way to conceive a child.
dude im at a party with a bunch of 17 year old gilrs this is awesome
no its not leave
We have a drunk bartender with her nips a quarter inch from bein out buying us shots. GET HERE.
You just said the magic words
I'm not making any promises. But if I start throwing food at you, just go with it.
I decided I'm going to give him a celebratory fuck for his accomplishments. Knocked on his door, handed him some condoms and said "I'll be over tonight with sex and booze"
I want to be you.
Today is the day I die from a hangover. I love you, mom. Farewell.
You put me in such a good mood with that road head, I bought everyone at Hooters donuts.
Just FYI, by the transitive property my breasts have now touched the Stanley Cup.
If the ex isent in town and im crying under a table somewhere because of it can we go to a drag show or something
we talked about the guy being eaten by the anaconda.. Then I proceeded to blow him
My boyfriend told me that I said I wanted to "feast on her vagina"... Glad I don't remember.
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