Today I realized that I've had whole drunk relationships with people. And sober me has and wants no part in it.
if socks could get pregnant i would have catholic amounts of kids
no.. I went home. Puking up hot dogs and lemon tart isn't as lovely as it sounds.
biggest mistake ever: halloween 2009
Dude, dont worry about the lamb fetus in the fridge.
What?
Just dont open the beer drawer.
Dude, the cops never think it's as funny as you do.
Since when do you have sex with people you have feelings for?
Dude you don't understand. I genuinely felt his soul's penis in my soul's vagina.
Whoever was the last to get in from the chinese firedrill had to pay the dealer.
The last thing I remember is sitting in a chair and him hand feeding me bell peppers
how many dildos make it a "collection?"
I have just gotten home. I saw a lot of penis tonight. On a trampoline. Shit got weird.
OPIZZABONMYDICK
I hope our bodies realize that workaholics starts tomorrow and will be well enough to handle the hell we are going to put them through. amen.
I'm imagining a seal in an ugly shirt hahahahaha Percocet
when the repo soundtrack came on in the middle of us having sex i realized it was about time that i clear out my itunes library
Randomize
