You would DIE at the bar we're at right now. All indian/asian med students, I swear
Asian doctor ratio. So hot. I would've gone into heat
i just got a Mexican deported. not sure how to feel.
i'm pissing behind 7/11. if you guys leave... i'll think it's funny too
have you ever wondered what it would feel like to stick those coneheads in your vaj
omg every time its on
I fucking love fucking science majors-- she told me that she wanted to know if her gag reflex got better or worse with alcohol, and that her initial evidence had been inconclusive. So, next few weeks, yeah, gettin blown periodically. All I have to do is keep a log.
I just deleted all the drug dealers from my phone, I guess this is growing up
That money I left you should go to the stripper that fell asleep in your bed. Sorry
What I do when I'm blackout drunk is none of my business.
What's it called where you go to the stripclub with two guys that have both gone down on you...
Tuesday
Finals week game: One shot for every psychological trauma I've been through that I have to explain in detail. Man I hate my major sometimes.
I want you more than I want a burrito.
I'm not as filling.
It's okay. I think we're back on. I just went on a dog walk with him n blew him on a sidewalk
We were in the uber and you were crying because you wanted to be an Olympic gymnast. The driver tried to console you and you just cried harder
He was a Cher impersonator. They are the draggest of queens
yeah. i tried to refuse to leave unless the burger king himself escorted me out. that didnt fly
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