We're like a lot better than the average bears
I have a love/hate relationship when men come within a 10 minute time frame.
four guys that i have slept with have come into my job today. FOUR. i feel like it's like bring your sex partners to work day.
So many stories. To uyou are sober. I heart you though. Jesus. Dirrty dancing jusyt came oine!!no. Lie.
you got me arrested i just think that goes without question you owe me a blowjob
you goin out tonight?
who is this.
your orgasm for tonight
Well I'm currently debating between getting toilet paper or getting my eyebrows waxed so... There's that
The engagement ring savings account is now the strippers and gin savings account. What are you doing tonight?
you ate the make a wish sign. Like actually chewed on it. It was our solution to going outside when the cops were there
Chipotle just hit me... I want to go sit in the corner of the shower and cry until morning.
Sensing a theme here
If alcoholism is a theme, yes.
She's eating hot cheetos out of the bag with chopsticks, Matt, how is she NOT my soulmate?
Had a very good bday. Have the teeth marks and bruises to prove it
I have so much to do, no motivation, and Harry Potter is on. You KNOW whats taking priority in my life right now
I need dick so bad, I’m dressing sexy for the school pick up line and sports practices to entice a few of the DILFs
Randomize
