i'm forgoing the post-coitus cuddling sesh to ask u this :when he says he loves me and all i can think to say is either "cool" or "i love boning you," what do i do?
My recently uploaded pictures to facebook: Me partying on Beale St. with a single girl on each arm. Ex's recently upload pictures: Several pictures of cats. I win.
my professor just said "the power of the situation"
drink
I havent jerked off in so long, my dick literally prevented me from rolling over in my sleep this morning. new definition of painful?
It's cheaper then a lap dance and you get your hair cut.
My roommate says its rare that you can be tear gassed before you lose your virginity so i feel accomplished in life
I never thought the first time a taser would be used on me would be at an applebees
You just said we could build a blanket and pillow "fuck fort." Of course I'm never leaving you.
I'm covered in European cum. How's your day going?
Aside from the possibility of pregnancy, I'm going to call last night a raging success.
I mean of all the things to be cockblocked by, Taco Bell is pretty high on the list
At least you didn't sleep with Ashley's uncle.
Her boyfriend offered to buy me a vibrator. I'm not sure how to feel about that.
Hey, do you know the person who woke me up last night at 1 in the morning yelling and being carried through the courtyard?
That was me Mom...
Pretty sure I scared her away last night by putting a vodka tampon in my ass
Randomize
