Tell your sister I'm no fool. Or at least romanticize the notion of the fool.
you're like a bully in the Christmas story
all we ever talk about is how much i like your dick or my drug problem.
So at what point while he was throwing up on the girl next to him did you think "yeah, im going to hit that"
She used the word "fragged" in proper context. tell me that's not bust-nut hot.
I've see this movie. You sext me after the bar and fall asleep mid sentence. Roll credits.
Great. My funeral dress now smells of smoke and disappointing sex.
you yelled "who's job is it to keep me from breaking shit" and then immediately ripped off the molding as you fell down the stairs.
Is all white too much for court to prove my innocents?
Aj and I already plan to tape our thumbs to our palms so we know how it feels to be a t-rex.
No more fucking baseball tools. Walk-of-shamed home in only a pinstriped jersey and a Red Sox SnapBack.
Thats gotta be it. Also just found out that the fireworks will fit in the airsoft pistols...we are all gonna die
All I am going to say is this: I woke up with lots of bruises on my knees from running around on all fours being a 'dinosaur'. Either girls night in went terribly wrong or terribly right.
Everything is covered in gelatin and pam cooking spray. Jesus be a shield.
Woke up way too warm in the middle of a spooning sandwich. Was working up a rant about still not wanting a threesome. Then I realized the littlest spoon was the dog. Might need to break up anyway.
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