just a forewarning-if you come home and hang out with your stupid girlfriend the entire time that you are here/fail to get wasted with us i will wish either death upon you or that you truly do turn gay when you return to the navy.
He told me he had more lines than a plaid shirt
I come up with the best drinking games while babysitting
Guess who left Professor Cunt on their paper by accident?
We can just chill or day drink or smoke or watch law and order marathon or play just dance 4 or watch a movie or go to the movies or play hide and seek or hug, so many options
please, i've had weekends with less dignity than this.
You tripped over nothing.. everyone stopped what they were doing and stared..you stood up and yelled "you win this time gravity"..then started chugging someone's drink
im watching blue is the warmest color at the music box and this dude is literally masturbating 3 feet in front of me
I feel horrible. I brought her to your house like a late night pizza delivery and dropped her off.
I was so high. I had so much hair. It was like all my hair follicles exploded.
I tried to suck your dick underwater and almost drowned
JUST DENIED A NEW YEARS KISS BECAUSE HE WAS A COWBOYS FAN.
Threw up on break at work. That brings our collective tally to 9 times. We can never drink like that on a monday again
she filled my toilet with birdseed... i tried flushing it but now it's clogged so she has to come over and fix it because it was her mistake in the first place
Right. Cuz nothing screams "You made it!" quite like selling your used underwear to strangers you met on the internet.
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