oh and i really hope miley falls off this mountain she is climbing
we're ranked number 5 for having the most pot in the country for a university school. idk if i should feel worried or just plain blessed.
What did I eat last night that was bloody?
Just hooked up with the fireman who put out the quesadilla fiasco last tuesday.
Apparently, "please don't I have to be in court tomorrow" is not a valid excuse for a girl to abstain from giving a massive hickey.
There was an unopened condom by my car when I went to pick it up this morning. Someone may have fucked on the hood of my car last night. Don't think it was me but I can't rule it out 100%.
We should drive around in your Jeep on snow days and get stoned while we help random strangers stuck in the snow. So much good karma.
Of course I'm using oj as a mixer, its flu season.
Can't feel body but making pizza rolls
I changed his name in my phone to "Irrelevant" last night. Not changing it back.
Just for once I'd like my first interaction with a new GP to not be an obvious sex injury.
Got so drunk last night I kinda sent a super on point sext to his kid sister...say a prayer man
Don't put me in that position. I am not qualified to be the responsible adult here.
outside on the street drinkin, walked into a random house and asked to pee, some kid hands me a beer and says i have to chug it first
I didn’t say it was classy, I said it was sexy
Randomize
