Cool, see you soon... she just admitted to her friends that it was a queef.
It's a sad day when you realize you are no longer above fucking in movie theater bathrooms.
lets start a swedish sibling band together
I just sneezed and it tasted like taco bell.
so i think im going to actually use my calories on food today instead of beer.
Just got walked in on during safety inspections
Think you passed?
I get a nice feeling when i open my fridge and see it filled with thirty beers and half a leftover jimmy johns pickle.
I woke up with a Nike swoosh shaved into my chest hair. my friend got 3 stitches. my phone had a text that simply read "fuck you". I say it was a good party.
like the penis drawn on my face is so detailed and well done, i'm not even upset about it.
I dont have any paper so I'm writing class notes on my first response direction pregnancy paper. Judging eyes are all around.
She had me dip my balls in cake batter ice cream from cold stone and then tea bag her. Let's get weird just got a whole new meaning.
There's a girl in the bathroom crying about something having to do with cream cheese.
I wasn't vocally whispering "she wants to bite your dick off" about that kirsten girl was I?
You tried to fight everyone, so we kept having her take her shirt off. You were sufficiently distracted...
I renamed some of my contacts in my phone before passing out and I have one I cant figure out, its "fucking house elf scum"
Randomize
