Lavender boy was great at seduction and crappy in bed.
come over
yeah sure
wait who is this again? my contacts got deleted...but tell me and ill be there in 10
She touched you, you're now contaminated for 48 hours. Please watch out for rashes, hives and STDs as she's known to have all three.
Nada. Shooting off confetti and wanted to see I'd u could see it from ur house.
Wow. Its not even 11am.
It's like split custody, only he's not a kid and they have sex with him.
blah blah blah they called me an alcoholic because I threw my beer at a Jesus freak. it was for the best
I'm going to have to start playing roller derby again so I can blame my sex-related bruises on that.
It's all fun and games until some random starts jerking it on the deck.
You ran down the alley towards a stranger screaming "you took my beer".... Then proceeded to run into a garage, fall down, and scream about how your shirt makes you look fat.
all I remember is grinding on everyone in the room regardless of gender and quoting the lion king non-stop. We need to stop buying Jameson.
Bro I just got a hand job playing tiny wings.. Hell yea
I knocked over his glass and he yelled "Oh no the boxed wine!" and slurped it off the coffee table. Then he showed me how to mix maple syrup, Jameson, and coffee. My family is better than your family.
So my furniture is upside-down, two lamps are glued to the ceiling, and there is a kitten sleeping on Kyle's face. Please tell me what happened last night....
Last night we proved the theory that "harder" is the worst rough sex safe-word ever.
My one night stand from last weekend is now taking me on a date this weekend. How is this my life?
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