i like that octo mom she is my favorite xmen
you used to get mad at me for mentioning 'unprotected sex' and happenings in my bed
well yeah, but then i realized the wisdom of your ways.
the jail released me with 39 mardi gras beads. I need details.
This may sound mean but have u ever just sat in class and look at some of the the people and think how disappointed their parents must be
Dwarf fight at five guys. Today was a good day.
Luckily my prof thought I was puking from nerves and gave me motivational mini speeches the entire final.
she's like the billy mays of hookups...touch my boobs and i'll throw in this blow job ABSOLUTELY FREE
You hid from a cop under some guy's canoe on his lawn.. It didnt work
he fell asleep like an hour after we got to the beach, he deserved that penis shaped sunburn.
(540): I ran 10 miles and then took a dump behind a rock. What the fuck have you done with a hangover that's comparable?
Why must everything this weekend have to do with something going into or coming out of my vagina?
I caught myself flirting with clients today. Someone needs to take me to pound town before I self destruct. This is a code red. I repeat code red.
By the way anyone who is willing to be in the film while tripping gets free shrooms.
I have banged to "The Emperor's New Groove" way more than could possibly be reasonable.
My parents are coming to visit the 28th. How bad is it that I put a reminder in my phone to "hide sex toys"?
Randomize