I looked at my own cervix.
bitch so ugly she owes me an erection
Long labias. Talking about. Too drunk to explain. Tomorrow.
Please tell me that's his leg and you didn't really just send me a picture of your dog's dick
Drunk cheerio confetti may seem like a brilliant idea when your drunk, but believe me, the next day, its a horrible, horrible mess.
Too lazy to make dinner. Had chocolate and scotch instead. Check in with me in a half hour.
Dude. All those hangovers I never had came back with a vengeance. I just opened the door of this car to barf. The car was not motionless. We are on the autobahn.
Watched twin sisters make out thought it was amazing sick on their part but legit to watch
idk. a stripper just bit me. I'm so disoriented
If I don't get to have sex with him soon my entire female reproductive system is gonna climb out of my body and choke me to death
Should I apologize for the loud sex I had in his living room? Because I'm not going to.
Definitely not.
please don't forget about the bread in the toilet i am absolutely not dealing with that
I think he just shit his pants. Yep he did. That's unfortunate.
Omg I should get on tinder just to get some edibles in town
I hope you know, that by sending me a cat meme back, you've entered in a cat picture battle; which never has an end in sight.
The duel has begun.
Randomize
