Worst part was I had to fart super bad and didn't want to ruin the room so I farted in a pillow and threw it under the bed.
so we had a 20 minute conversation and created the fb page WWND (what would Nana do?) last night after we took our Ambien...that is my definition of an overachiever
My STD test came back clean. I'd like to thank all the guys I've slept with, they made this possible. I want to say thanks to all my friends, for believing in me living up to the full slut potential. And last but not least, I'd like to thank alcohol. I wouldn't be who I am today w/out you. I feel like I need to frame this...
SLUTTIEST. 4TH. EVER.
she has an amazing ass but I need more beers to get past her horse face. It works out perfect becauseI can use her teeth as a bottle opener.
So if a 2 is a 10 on the road... do we consider college to be "on the road?" help. its urgent.
He just fingered me to the Lion King soundtrack. And when he left he turned dramatically and said "I'll be back after work. Be prepared." Taint ALL the childhood memories.
He recognized me by my ass from about 15 yards away. I must have a REALLY nice ass.
But mostly the blowjob in the airport bathroom was what I was laughing at.
My vday gift was a joint bouquet, Finding Nemo on bluray, and a good shower fuck.
Um, WHAT A FUCKING KEEPER!
I went to bed at ten on a Friday night I have virtues to spare
But I did spend part of my morning scrubbing your cum off my grandmothers piano.
I'm not sure what exactly you were planning, but you kept yelling that we were going to need a lot of midgets and a lawyer.
Dude. why do I feel like I am cheating on you every time I do shrooms?
I’m going to have to rewatch all of them. Drugs, man.
Randomize
