Spaghetti and Car Bombs, good idea or what will end up on the bar in a few minutes?
he has officially spend more money on me than any other boy. and its all gone to plan b. awesome.
We hadn't had sex in so long that I started queefing and then I couldn't stop giggling... I think he's mad.
Escorted a stripper to her car last night,and all I got was a "Thanks" and "Go Steelers."
This would be a good time for the don't get drunk and bang a married chick pep talk...
The spray paint was a bad idea, 'insert penis here' isn't coming off
I just call them the hipster frat because they wear shirts other than pastel polos and listen to MGMT while playing dice.
Well, I have a text in my phone that just says "Scrumtrelescent" from a girl I have in here as "Cheesy Tits", so you figure out how my night was going.
DON'T WEAR PANTS.
I REPEAT.
DO. NOT. WEAR. TROUSERS.
I wanted lighthearted conversation about ordering bulk condoms and anal lube but he's depressed and talking about god hating him, ugh
just chugging fertility tea and vodka, no big deal.
I feel a little uneasy about having my grandma sleep in my bed that I've banged chicks in not too long ago... Fuckin blizzards
Well I want to be mistreated and called a slut and finger banged
But I guess hugs would be nice
Her cat was breathing in my ear all night, like that kid from Hey Arnold.
I drank Dr. Pepper and instant breakfast mix together and threw up sober for the first time.
Randomize
