idk hes just been lookin at me weird all night
he probably just wants to cut your skin off and wear you like a body suit
does my mom think that having an ed hardy lighter is going to get her laid?
he turned the pretty ricky playlist on. its about to go down.
They called security on the security guard who tried to break up the party in their suite. You tell me how drunk they were.
Who was that guy I met at your brother's house who had to get stitches in his ass?
His rich uncle has six months to live. I feel pregnant.
We just reached that moment of the night when you start making cookie quesadillas. Party on Wayne
Whiskey dick is like insurance for making bad decisions
It has gotten to a point where I just want to sit on his face. Less butterflies, more orgasms.
I'm totally going to bang the cable guy tonight. I'm so pumped
Other than unclothed paranormal encounters, how has your day been
The part where he comes over and ignores you isn't what makes me mad about that story... It's the fact that he ate your tacos, AND THEN proceeded to ignore you. That's cold hearted.
Just to clarify, i'm coming over for tacos not a threesome
I thought accidentally shaving off my fingertip while trying to shave my butthole was going to be the most unexpected part of my day, but no
Honestly his girlfriend says she hates me cause she thinks im trying to get him to cheat on her with me...she should hate me cause i already accomplished that.
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