Dude she looked like Jerry Garcia's knuckles
I'm not saying he was bad at sex, but I'm pretty sure I anti-climaxed.
I did a mental Irish jig when he pulled out the second condom.
I'm getting drunk watching the disney channel. Is this a main reason why we aren't together anymore?
will barter weed for kareoke machine...
it's only monday and im already failing all my classes. i give up. tequila tuesday is my only friend.
I don't drink so I see St. Patty's as an LSD type of day. Its like a more hardcore 420
I just yelled at my mom for getting me circumcised without my permission. That drunk
I am not exagerating when I say the thought "screw you future me" actually just went through my head
seriously they are like going to hulk burst through. There are perks and downfalls to having big boobs
I need to have sex. It's becoming like a matter of public safety.
who orders an old fashioned in 2014? even my Grandparents think you're an asshole.
Things that don't wash off in the shower: black eyes and hickies.
We need to find out what drug we took so we can take it everyday from here on out
Looks like taco salad for lunch. I may have died and gone to be better circle in hell than I thought.
Randomize
