i jhust puked up my retainher.
So i had sex for a couple seconds last night
I just pulled the condom that i lost on tues out of me at work ewwww!
mom just called and i was mid bong hit but i answered anyways coughing and sounding rough she the apologized for waking her little angel up. its 2PM
No vaginas are yucky and I don't think you're old enough to handle one yet
a girl is trying to cook hot pockets in a saute pan on the stove.
it's sunday funday. and also, who can outslut the other day.
After New Year's Eve I will be hibernating my life away. Only wake me up for skiing, schnapps, and sex. In that order.
I started making my dollar bills into rings for the strippers
I think their strategy was based on people bein at a beach, seein a rainbow, and havin an orgasm at the same time.
The gay viking and his eqyptian 'queen' hooked up on our couches. They pushed them together to make a bed. Innovative, but awkward to come home from work to at 7 am.
She sucks. And I almost hooked up with a clown last night
Date idea: we should go to the store and buy all the different kinds of Lay's and eat them all
Oh god. I just had a sex dream about the talking dog from the Bush's Baked Beans commercials.
Why would you ask him if you could lick his chest?
He has a very lickable chest
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