Did he leave or is he still there?
He left right away, I might have passed out. I saw your text and was like who left where? Then the oh shit feeling sunk in, hangover starting now.
oh God, I have a dick of a middle schooler
i have absolutely no control over my now miserable and whore-ish lifestyle.
She has her iPod in her ears slippers and sweats on and is walking around the house up and down the stairs getting "exercise" she just stopped for a water break
dude, there's a fucking musical in my head. it's fucking awesome being this high.
I have never made a good decision in that bathroom...
im never drinking wine from a person in a wet suit and goggles ever again.
Idk if you've ever had the pleasure of 1. Vomiting on a sidewalk - at 3 in the afternoon 2. Vomiting nachos or 3. Vomiting nachos out of your nose but really I do not advise any of the above.
Come part with me. By you sleep! No fun. Idek feelings Sorry for your life.
Most senic walk of shame ever. This is why you go to school in Hawaii.
im in the post action - pre consequence stage.
It's a little sad/awesome that I scored coke within 60 seconds of walking in the bar.
The student becomes the teacher.
So tomorrow I have my performance review with my boss who I banged. When I go in should I ask if this review will be rating my sex or work performance?
I think if my mom ever finds out about my nipple piercings I'll just be like "mom, tbh it's a sex thing"
He was married to his college girlfriend for 20 years. Just give him the blow job he’s been fantasizing about since last century and he’ll be wrapped around your little finger
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