He ignores my calls like im some kind of stalker chick
Ive only called 5 times
Its like common courtesy of dating, the guy pays for the weed, just like dinner
I just heard a woman call her child a butt face. Repeatedly. He's crying now. I love walmart.
You were demanding water from a bottle but I didn't have one..so I just took the water bottle from the hamster cage. You're welcome.
Fell asleep on the Grass at Lolla woke up in the Brown line. What. The. Fuck.
I'm a little upset you wasted 3 beers on your wet tee shirt contest.
don't pay it forward
I eont pay shit forward. told a stranger to call an abulance and peaced
I woke up at 5:47 in the morning to you peeing on my parents bedroom floor. I think we've established that you have a limit .
Dude, I found out having naked people in your car is a felony.. Now were all fucked.
Are the homeless actually allowed to bathe in fountains located on Main Street in downtown Houston? Can Houston TX be so progressive as to condone public bathing?
We're you guys there last night when everyone started chanting "Nacho Steph"? Someone picked me up, carried me to the nacho cheese and made me do a nacho cheese stand.
I'm wearing the monkey suit out tonight. I hope you're ok with it leaving the bedroom
Her son walked into the middle of the living room, took off his diaper, shit on the floor, smiled at me, and walked out, as if nothing happened.
So date night went well?
Where the fuck are you? I just got punched in the nose by a tourist
You were pretty conviced that my dog was a spanish child and kept trying to read him the news from your iphone app
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