Have fun fixing the bed from last night Bob Villa.
At least you didn't call me Brittany this time
This was all being yelled across a beer pong table as all important things should be discussed
and I'm going to name my autobiography "blow jobs with enthusiasm are the best"
I'm naming my autobiography "Reasons Not to Date Girls From Texas."
when I picked him up he smelled like cheeseburgers, had a bite mark around his left nipple and we think someone stabbed him in the forehead with a pencil... it was like the Hangover meets Texas Chainsaw Massacre
is it too early in the day to continue our conversation about penis shapes?
What I dont get, is for a man with a penis his size, to choose to go back with another girl instead of one that he says is the best sex he's ever had. He cant afford to be picky.
I'll be there in 5 min. If not, read this again.
The plan is to make enough mistakes this weekend to hold me over until spring break
We officially wrote our house rules 1. We do not waste alcohol 2. Pinky promises mean something 3. Don't leave your facebook open, and if you do, don't complain 4. Never refuse cuddle or catch phrase
just cuz theres a goalie doesnt mean i cant commandeer the goal and become a way better goalie
Can you get the drug form of snow for the blizzard this weekend?
We were fucking and his phone rang and it was his grandma. He just had a conversation with his grandma while fucking me from behind. Then his dad called and asked him what he wanted from taco bell.
Is it a problem if I'm trying to condition Goodbye Horses to trigger an erection?
I HAVE TOO MICH DICK TALKING TO ME IDK WHAT TO DO.
Hey what are you up to?
I am wear the people with the mustaches live. I have found their home.
DUDE, WE BOUGHT THE ACID TOGETHER.
Randomize
