also, i may or may not be wearing a cape right now. hint: i am.
I'm not saying he was bad at sex, but I'm pretty sure I anti-climaxed.
We got bored. So we went to planned parenthood to stare at everyone who made worse decisions than us last night.
Is it wrong to want to cut a hole in the Tigger suit so I can molest you while I wear it?
this girl walked outta his room as i was walkin in to scottys and i just say " time for the walk of shame baby! whoooo!". she ran away
You got ahold of his prescription papers and gave out prescriptions for cranberry and vodka
first off, his name is dougie. strike one.
I wasn't expecting a boner of this magnitude
He completely dissapeared at the baseball game. We found him passed out at the hotel three hours later with souviner photos of himself at the top of the Sears Tower.
I got carried out by security last night. AND the taxi had to drive up onto the sidewalk to get me i was that drunk.
Blasting venetian snares and drinking a beer. I love being an adult. It's like being a child but with beer for breakfast, better music, and no one yells at you.
my phone went off during the middle of it and he ask what i was doing. he wouldn't let my reply with "your boss". ..
Executive order 941: BRING ME THE FINEST PANCAKES!
You have got to stop watching the West Wing before going out.
Sorry it's taking so long, it's harder to take an ass pic with an iPad than you think
I woke up in the bathroom clutching a stuffed shark. My night was fantastic, thanks for asking.
Randomize
