if you force a hooker to have sex with you and dont pay her would it be rape or theft? something to ponder
And Anthony pissed on himself at the strip club
you handed the cop a condom last night and said "it's all about protect and serve right?"
Nothing says walk of shame better than a onesie and a 12 pack of corona..
You know just sitting here carrying on a conversation with a 5 yr old about why there is puke at the landing of the staircase
I have never smelled more like a drunk mariachi band than I do right now.
You get drunk and try to bury your girlfriend in the sand JUST ONCE and all hell breaks loose
It feels like one of my ribs evaporated.
I also have bagel bites. I know that's not as big an incentive as the cocksucking but.....
I feel like that xmas present negates everything we were taught as little girls. Putting out DOES pay. God bless us everyone
Can't meet up at the party. Gary was caught by the cops attempting to drop a deuce thru his ex wife's Subaru via sun roof. Details as soon as bail is processed.
I am in no place to make rational decisions, but right now i want you inside me
i just remember singing the theme song from 2 and 1/2 men to my hair
You do realize it’s only a matter of time before I have a bad day and come home with an alpaca?
I can’t believe you’re letting her use the Mercedes
It seemed like a better idea while she was giving me a hand job. It’s a good thing we weren’t having sex. Who knows what I would agree to during sex
Randomize
