i cant believe jose lima did steroids
apparently the kind that make you shitty at baseball
i've never seen someone fall down the steps so gracefully... i think im in love
If i die in the snow, get to my laptop and delete all of the nickelback. password is "barry"
as in "white"?
He just said "wow, thats some rly nice hair! And those teeth..thosee are some cool teeth"
I wore my underwear in the shower just in case i passed out and you had to come in and get me
Ok! I picked up an anti-celebratory bottle of champagne on the way to dinner for her going to rehab. That's how I feel about this...
Ur dog was like a damn middle school chaperone this morning trying to lay between us after what he saw us do last night
my taxi driver is listening to 50 shades of grey audiobook. this is uncomfortable.
$1 drinks and Playboy theme. I am never leaving this place
This is the third year in a row that Mario has fallen through a table on New Years. I'm sensing a tradition developing.
And what in gods fuck were you drinking. It tasted like windex with a mixture of juce
I was struggling morally, but once I let go, I came pretty hard.
When I woke up this morning I swear my mouth tasted like dick and rolaids.
I made a powerpoint to trip to.
you are so studious.
When I planned out my evening, "co-author lesbian vampire erotica" was not anywhere on my list of expected activities.
Me neither, but hey, this is where we've ended up. Let's embrace the moment.
Randomize
