But do you think a lot of ppl use facebook as a masturbation supplement to porn?
Let me make clear that I am not a facebook masturbator
I want to have your abortion
I am so stoned and my professor is handing out candy. I love Halloween.
It was one time. Now I have to constantly remind her my name is Jessica not Jizzica.
So dude, she and I just got done having the most amazing sex, and then she rolled over and said that "lets make some tacos" and proceeded to the kitchen... naked... I'm buying the ring tomorrow
Even the French judge on the olympics would give that a 10
You are two creepy Justin Bieber quotes away from me not talking to you for the rest of the day
If I had a pelvic thrust emoticon, I would use it
She brought up feelings... her days are numbered
Made a salesman quit his job, a saleswoman cry, and got a manager to half shout "fuck this"....successful drunk Christmas shopping
You rubbed your penis on my leg and said "people have paid for this kind of action"
As I was puking, these 2 guys started peeing next to me chanting me on
Say whatever you bloody well like; you don't know the true meaning of life until you have smoked to a Sade cd.
When she tells her friend, "hey I'll be back tomorrow, just going to fuck a guy", right in front of you, you know you've got a winner.
As long as he continues to be our subleaser and continues to fuck me, I think it's acceptable for me to steal a piece of bread here and there.
Not sure how my purse ended up in the bushes last night... Or why there was a noodle strainer in the toilet.
Ever get that feeling that you're the back up booty call and half way through securing the fake date excuse to try to get in your pants, the guy hears back from the original booty call and drops the conversation with no explanation?
Randomize
