you know when i was in school the girls definitely did not have the tits the 15 year olds have now. so unfair.
Making the executive decision for drunk you to not sleep in the lofted bed that has no ladder
He deserves to hear about your Vagina Shrooms
If I don't have herpes this will be the single greatest day of my life
there's sperm and chicken noodle soup everywhere
She's clinging to me like a horny koala.
High enough to ask the woman at best buy if she ever feels like she's swimming. and telling the man outside that he smells like happy juice.
you really need to remember next time not to write your name and phone number on the paper its wrapped in.
But what if it got lost?
its illegal. you dont want people to contact you if they find it.
Still stoned. I like your bong. It can stay. No others, though.
Throwing up into Nora's potty chair while simultaneously having beer shits was truly the highlight of my Christmas season.
Totally just made a post sex emergency cupcake run. My life is awesome.
I biked home blackout drunk last night, but I have some memory of throwing my bike in a rage when I couldnt get it down the stairs. No idea on the bright orange puke in the sink.
I didn't know I was invited to an orgy.
Parade of Dicks...that's what I'm calling 2017
There are twenty eight units in that building. There has to be at least one heterosexual in it. You can't have fucked your way through all of it.
Randomize
