bought some hannah montana deodorant. hope it doesnt make me smell untalented
while we were making out your friend starting kissing my toes and all you had to say was "just go with it"
I really think that guy just walks around with tennis balls in his pocket. No dick is that big
i think the theme of this summer is "shitting in weird locations."
I thought my period ended but I felt it again as soon as Pitbull started playing
I just want to fall into a pit of xannies and eat my way out.
Then you bent down and whispered, "excuse me mr. Stair, could you please stop moving?"
Turn on the Discovery Channel
Lets fuck to motorcycle gang fighting
I'm floating on a 30mph cloud right now not giving a fuck
My blue shorts are now brown from all the stripper fake tan
She's astronaut crazy. She will wear Depends and drive 12 hrs non-stop if you swipe right.
Challenge accepted
Nothing says Happy Thanksgiving like picking cocaine boogers out of your nose at your parents house.
He is completely naked, curled in a ball, and rocking back and forth in the shower humming lullabies to himself. This is your responsibility since I'm going to be fucking someone in 5.7 seconds.
27 year olds can still do oral in a car right? Or is that trashy?
At this point, I would not mind getting hit by a truck. It would mean I could get this over with quicker.
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