11:03 p.m. Whats a lie i you lovn me. Let's cuddle.
Man, ugly runs in her family
yeah, big time
Those former-lesbian gone white-trash bars always seem to be your favorite.
For the amount I put out, I should be going on way more dates.
why oh why did i suck thise tits. nothing but trouble fuuuuuu
They're doing a Bong-A-Thon for 4/20. I don't care if you quit. You are coming out of your weed retirement for this.
He needs to respect me before he can fuck me with cat ears on.
There's a picture of you on facebook laying in the street with 3 cops standing over you after you faceplanted off that guy's shoulders.
Is that what happened to my face?!
He was running late for work this morning, so I helped him out by finding a matching pair of black socks. And I hated it. So I'm currently drinking and reminding myself of the reasons I will never get married.
The band last night was really good
That was definitely karaoke. Guess that answers my follow up question on how drunk you were.
Don't forget the part about the bar bathroom stumbles.
Oh damn, you're right. I have to include that. You turned off all the lights with your head. That was impressive.
In other news, I had my first sex related injury of the school year so that's cool
You can't die you're my only democrat family member
I emptied a Vyvance capsule into my coffee pot last night and set the auto start. Pretty sure I've been drinking meth all morning
Reverse road head. Sa-witch!!!
Randomize
