Oh no. He has the "I'm 30 years old and I just shit myself in public" face.
you were carrying around a glass of vodka telling everyone it was Russian water
she quoted hannah montana in her facebook status. i will never be speaking to her in person again.
Ah, the precious few moments between when i wake up and when i realize why i'm sleeping on a treadmill.
I wonder what it would be like to go to the dry cleaners and not have to inform them that all my clothes are stained with booze.
Literally passed out while tubing... Boating while hammered is a blast but thank God for life jackets
Well regardless of where or with who you will be blacking out and i will be pouring shots down ur throat like a baby bird
Totalylr drunk. Coveredc in cryola marker. Loving it. Straight men everywhere. Don't be surprises when I'm pregbat romorrowwwww
There is a girl on the metro with no shoes and she's using a Crown Royal bag as a purse.
We legit stopped the the game so that Jamie and I could throw up in the bushes, and then continue to play intramurals... this is what my life is coming to1
when the officer asked him if he had been drinking, he just goes, "yeah, you?" then falls onto the table.
I told him I'd ride his broomstick if he let me call him Harry Potter and drew a lightning bolt on his forehead.
how did you set a fucking salad on fire????????
I think a major source of concern would be the fact you snorted a shot. Who does that?
The blunt fell in the hottub, i mean i knew she was upset but i didnt expect her to dive for it and come up balling her eyes out...
Randomize
