I'm watching a show called "I didn't know I was pregnant" on TLC...Apparently this happens enough that there is a series
is it really high of me to have brought my own hot sauce to wendys?
i have a strong feeling i fucked one of the waiters here...
I just threw up in my hands while sitting on the toilet
he walked down the highway for 3 miles at 4 am, and got me coffee on the way. i dont think a blow job would have been enough.
How many times do I have to drunk reject you for our friendship to become awkward? Cause were at 9 as of last night
I just got a reminder alert on my phone for an event I titled "Bradley getting stupid high with me in bed." I assume we planned this during the party. I'm down if you are.
it's my birthday, i should be around people i want to fuck
Jusy read on a science page that squeezing boobs can prevent cancer cells from forming in them, youre welcome.
I know you're on a date and I should leave you alone but about twenty minutes ago I realized I haven't been spanked in years so if you're still looking for a birthday present, you know, consider it.
She showed up after 3 hours and proceded to make us all feel like resonable human beings. I dont know how she did it but she did it.
Well supposedly when the cops came, they say I tried to get them in a conga line like Jim Carrey in The Mask. So....yea
After we had sex he gave me a thumbs up... fucking A&M Aggies, man
We did blind alcohol taste testing and she got 10 of 10. I'm in love.
ugh my stomach is so upset-- didn't get a chance to take a violent enough hangover shit at work
Randomize
