So its not gay if you have sex with another woman and its academic
so what if I'm having sex with a woman for recreation?
Thats gay
from now on, im only gona ahve sex with my boyfriend.
If a girl is wearing Ed Hardy from head to toe, does that make her a douchebagette?
I did that thing where I cum for no reason again.
that's almost as bad as that time i almost ashed in a baby carriage
You were like pukeahontas last night, you tried to tell us you were okay, then you puked in the garden.
They don't allow McDonald's in the ER. Go figure
It is a special kind of bonus when you find money you hid from yourself when you were drunk in the tampon box. What did we do last period?
If I could drive and get you Starbucks I would... But that's probably not a good idea. On account of the drugs.
I came to the party for him. I don't know where he went, but I mentioned being hungry and his housemate brought me a huge tupperware container of berry cobbler. I think I'll stay.
anyways, do you want to make more embarrassing memories that im bound to remind you about later and laugh about?
So it's my mom's birthday and I wanted to be super cheap and just walk up to her and say "I got you the greatest gift ever, mom! I'm actually sober right now!".
Reading becomes significantly more difficult when people are having crazy loud sex in an adjoining room
Just bought 2 liters of wine and frozen waffles for dinner. Is this 30?
It’s a prereq for med school, so I hope the professor likes blow jobs
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