Would you object to my putting the bidet video on my Facebook page? It;s awesome.
Do ugly people know they are ugly?
The quiet ones do.
i just saw a man dusting the fake palm trees at the mall
...welcome to nebraska
whatcha mean you cant get rid of genital warts? thats not what my girlfriend says
We were drinking cognac with TAB. I felt like trailer park royalty.
i thought to myself 'what a productive day'. then i realized all ive done is one load of laundry and shaved my balls.
Well, if they're both my boyfriend.. Then i cheated on both of them.
No, but its not like diarrhea. i swear its like my intestines had a secret bank account and i just punched in the right pin.
Currently getting "blaow" buzzed into my pubes. How's your thursday?
So guess who got away with telling their girlfriend she's insane multiple times in a Valentine's day card. Yup, this guy.
So drunk I thought the door was feeling me up for a seconds
hitting rock bottom is getting taziki in your hair & simply putting it in a bun instead of actually dealing with it, just like your problems
starting to feel like a fuck wizard with a magical sixth sense for people fucking.
All I know is I woke up cuddling a jar of peanut butter....
The streets are paved with hand jobs
Randomize
